NOT FAIR, NOT RIGHT, NOT LOGICAL,…..RAPE

28 Sep

I imagine that from the title you already realize that this is one of my RANTS. It is very hard for me to witness something not fair, not right, not logical, and not say anything about it. It is also very hard for me not to admit that the more I think about the two genders the more I realize how us MEN have really abused our position in life.

One topic that has been bothering me recently is that of RAPE.

What would you do if one day, while at a coffee shop, a van pulls up next to where you are sitting, and in a “MISSION IMPOSSIBLE” style, four beautiful women emerge, forcefully kidnap you, drive you to a safe house, and rape you for hours before releasing you ?

This was the question I asked ten guys. the responses were …. well you judge.

“Get on the phone and call all my friends”, “Ask them for their phone number”, “Offer to pay for the van rental next time”, “Would be incredible as long as I was able to keep up with all four”, etc…..

Even though ten men are by no way a good representation of the all men, and even though I hate generalizations myself, yet believe me such a scenario would be a dream come true for most men.

When I tried to ask that question to ten women, in some cases I wasn’t even allowed to continue the question, some were really offended at how horrible of a question this was, one cried, and most expressed utter disgust and fear at the idea.

Yes, to any woman, rape is probably the closest experience to death, in fact many would wish for death instead.

All of this leads to my question:” How fair, how RIGHT, and how logical is it that a male gets to judge a rapist, when a male cannot fully comprehend the crime of RAPE?

Men have no clue as to the relationship between a woman and her body. A woman’s body reacts to her emotions, while a man’s body reacts in a much more mechanical and chemical way. Women’s feelings, emotions, and body act as one unit in responding to stimulation, while a man’s body reacts to stimulation independent of his feelings and emotions which can only act as enhancers when present. Simply, women are in control of their bodies while men are, to a certain extent, controlled by them. That is why, even though a man might know how bad RAPE is, but he might never fully understand the effects of such a crime on a woman. That is why RAPE, to one gender, is a death sentence, yet to the other it could be something to brag about. Steeling is bad, but shop lifting is not as bad as robbing a bank, and if you don’t know which steeling did the thief commit, you are in no position to pass a fair judgement on him or her.

I do apologize for generalizing so much, and I do hope that you know I don’t mean to picture men as mechanical feelingless beasts, however, I do know that the way we relate to our bodies is much more primitive and mechanical than women do. I also know that if laws pertaining to RAPE were not mostly written and enforced by men, RAPE would not have been as prevalent as it is today…… we know it’s really really bad, but not how bad it really is.

RAPE is not fair, not right, not logical, and neither is allowing a gender that does not fully comprehend it, to deal with it.

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11 Responses to “NOT FAIR, NOT RIGHT, NOT LOGICAL,…..RAPE”

  1. kokoswife September 28, 2011 at 7:32 pm #

    You are so right and insightful. I like how sensible your argument is! If only the world would think like you or at least read your blogs. Until then, keep writing… I am waiting with baited breath for your next posts.

    • Karim Maksoud September 28, 2011 at 8:24 pm #

      Thank you for your reading and your thoughts

  2. Monica Tarullo October 4, 2011 at 3:54 pm #

    Now i agree in some ways but now ask those same 10 guys the same question but add that they dont get to have regular sex but they were being raped with dildos or whatever the rapists want and i gaurentee all their answers will change. also to add in with the males if they feel that in the minds “is it okay to THINK about raping someone,and is it okay or not?” obviously if it’s some extremely hot person that they actually want to have sex with it would be understanding to enjoy but what if it was someone that completely grossed you out? would you still have the same thoughts that it wouldnt bother you? I think not! when is it ever a hot chick that want to rape someone…or a hot male? it just never happens that way. hot or not if a female feels pushed in one direction or another they will not have the same response as males. You have to consider all options when coming across with such a strong topic. because you have to understand that 1 in 3 females have been either sexually abused or raped. Now knowing that, you can see why the females you asked responded the way they did. it is like having a hot chick come up to you with a strap on and over powering you and taking over. No male would ever be okay with that. that’s where the females and the the males would have the same response.

    • Karim Maksoud October 4, 2011 at 4:58 pm #

      I completely agree and what you are saying differs not from what I said … My point is that the relationship between a woman and her body is a much more advanced, much deeper, much more spiritual one than men have with there bodies… And men who cannot fully understand that relationship neither do they understand the effects of rape on a woman should not be in charge of judging such a crime….
      You say that the same men that I asked about a being raped by 10 beautiful woman would not be okay with that scenario if ugly disgusting woman and dildos were involved … I do agree … But what are you saying here … My question to you is if one of those men is asked to lay judgement on a rape case ( rape of a woman that is) would they ask first if the rapist was hot or not and if the rape involved sexual positions that were okay to the victim?
      It might take dildos and ugliness for men to see rape as bad but If I was a woman I wouldn’t want those men in charge of protecting me from rape… Is it okay that they think that rape by a beautiful woman is okay but by an ugly one using a dildo is bad… And do you want those same men that might think that if a woman is raped by a movie star missionary style on a bed of roses is not so bad, getting justice for a rape victim …. I don’t think so…
      Beautiful or not , missionary style or with dildos, on a bed of roses or in a warehouse, rape is rape and there is a gender that understands that and one that views it as … Well depends on how nice of a setting it was….
      I will have you know that most men don’t even understand that some women are raped by there own husbands … That concept is alien to them. The response I usually get is : Thats crazy how can a man having sex with his wife be rape? It’s like mental, psychological, and verbal abuse, to men using profanity and screaming with a woman is just that, but feeling like they have the right to ask a woman to stay home, give up a career, and not make financial decisions in a house hold … Well that’s just how things are, to them that’s not rape or abuse at all.
      Thank you

      • Richard Teson October 4, 2011 at 8:36 pm #

        How many guys do you know that have been raped by a female? most men who have been raped or sexuely molested have been done by other men..you ask the same question to men if a van pulled up and 10 men jumped out and grabed them,took them to a house or wharehouse and raped them would they have the same feelings? would they call there friends and still brag? you cant use the senerio of hot wemon raping a guy because no man would consider it rape in that point it would be willing..you cant rape the willing.It wouldnt work the same way if some girl was compleatly ugly and fat and horrable looking its goig to be hard to rape the guy seeing how the guy would not be eroused to be raped..look at it as if the guy was raped like the females were raped..by Men and ask them the same question!!

        Its impossable to be raped by a really hot female
        because you woulld be willing..no one would fight it

      • Karim Maksoud October 5, 2011 at 3:50 am #

        i love your comment as it really got me thinking and you know you are absolutely right, in fact i think you reconfirm my thought.
        you say: ” it is impossible to be raped by a really hot female because you would be willing… no one would fight it”
        now what kind of being is WILLING to engage sexually just because the other person is really hot….MEN ARE.
        and thats exactly it if you were a woman thats a rape victim would you depend on a judge that sees it impossible to be raped by a woman just because she is beautiful …. your point is absolutely true and its a big part of what i see is the problem . The unity between soul, body, and mind that women have is a concept foreign to most men, and thats why understanding how this unity is violated can only be very limited a fact that is mirrored by how limited your identification of rape has been , i.e. its only rape if its done by another man and its impossible to be rape if it was done by a beautiful woman.
        we are not as emotionally aware as they are neither are we fit to judge the violation of such emotional state.
        thanks a lot for your comment i really appreciate all of it.

  3. Monica Tarullo October 5, 2011 at 5:23 pm #

    I wouldn’t fight if I was being raped by a very hot female either. But that’s not a logical question! I believe some men are as emotionally aware as females but the only way a male should judge this act is if they have had a similar experience in their own life. And let my re phrase myself it’s not to judge but more to understand and comprehend the emotional and physical abuse that has occured. You are giving guys a bad name I think that not all guys would agree with these statement. But that’s where you get the discussion panel from. I also believe some men do have an emotional and spiritual connection with their bodies. Did you talk to 10 different men? Or were they all pretty much the same genre? I think deep down anyone being forced to do something they completely don’t want to do, male or female, will feel violated. Because that is what rape is. Someone forcing someone to do something against their will. You can’t rape the willing comment means it’s not rape. It has to be against ones will. And until it is against ones will one can’t say they were RAPED!

    • Karim Maksoud October 6, 2011 at 7:51 pm #

      I agree that this does look bad for men, and i believe that generalization in any scenario is never a good thing yet,not all men are emotionally detached from their bodies and the ones that are, are not so at the same levels. We are all different, i agree. Men’s current general state didn’t appear overnight and its not a characteristic that is attached to being a male biologically.
      Two genders are born, male and female ➜ one gender, males, are born biologically bigger and stronger ➜ their environment at the time, emphasized the need for strength and muscles ➜ naturally they rise to a position of superiority to the other gender because, what they had in physical strength and size, was whats needed to hunt, defend, navigate the rugged terrain, etc…➜ developing in a psychological and natural environment such as this where the physical is rewarded while emotions are considered a sign of weakness or just simply not needed, men have continued that trend on ➜ over the ages men end up a gender that has not invested in their emotional well being, have not given any importance to psychological development, and in fact over the coming years dove deeper and deeper into a physical and material existence ➜ not to forget that being the superior gender, they have reached the top, they had no need to develop psychologically and deal with suppression and discrimination and limitations on their freedom as women did ➜ all this leads to a gender that relates in a much more physical way with the world, has very limited understanding of their emotional and psychological state, and a gender that has been trained to have less value for the effect of feelings in their life.
      all I’m saying is that MAN as he stands today is in no way a good being to rely on in judging a rape crime, putting laws pertaining to rape crimes, or even fighting rape of women. Being male or female has nothing to do with hating rape, you just need to be a human being to know how incredibly savage of a crime it is, and trust me most men hate it just as much as women do, yet the effect of that rape on a woman’s psychology, body, and soul, is a concept that men in general are not emotionally mature enough to understand. They know its bad just not how bad it really is. steeling is bad, but steeling a car is not as bad as robbing a bank and if you as a judge don’t know which one was committed, you can still pas a judgement because steeling is bad, but it won’t fit the crime till you have a better understanding of what really happened.

  4. Monica Tarullo October 6, 2011 at 9:21 pm #

    Where are you getting judging from? Who and why would judging come into play in the normal world?

    • Karim Maksoud October 8, 2011 at 10:30 pm #

      Sorry for the late reply Monica but i think I’m coming down with a cold or something, I’ve been out of it for the past few days.
      Any way JUDGING…. when i say JUDGING, I’m talking about our judicial system, one that have not seen a female supreme court justice till 1981, one that to out of the 112 supreme court justices that have been appointed to it in its entire history, only 3 women have been part of it, one that 96.4 of all supreme court justices have been men, one that, with all these facts, is supposed to be the judicial body in charge of laws that govern the every day life of women. For 180 years all justices have been males, males that understand that pregnancy is hard, not how hard it really is, understand that rape is bad, not how bad it really is, and understand women, but not who women really are…. yet for 180 years, and till now, this very unrepresentative judicial system, has been dealing with rape, abortion, maternity laws, etc….
      16.55% of our 112th congress are women while 83.45% are males when our population has more females than males, intact for every 100 females there are only 97 males.
      Did you know that there is no national rape law the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, but each state has its own laws regarding sexual aggression.
      Did you know until 1975 most UNITED STATES rape statutes precluded the prosecution of spouses involved in marital rape, even when legally separated, South Dakota was the first to remove such exemption, and North carolina was the last in 1993.
      Do you still think that men are qualified to tackle the problem of rape.
      It took a lot of activism from a lot of dedicated feminist groups that fought hard to get us to where we are now.
      I know that most human beings understand that rape is an incredible outrageous crime, but i think man, in his current developmental state, that is not as emotionally mature, cannot understand the true extent of the effects of such a crime on a much more emotionally mature and aware being like a woman, and thus, is not capable of providing laws with adequate consequence and matching severity to a crime which he is not capable of FULLY understanding. That male judge presiding over a rape case cannot fully comprehend the full effect of that crime on a woman, not only that, but even the laws at his disposal fall short of addressing the true severity of rape.
      Please understand that this is not true for each and every single man, but in GENRAL this has been something that I found to be true, from my own interactions with men and women.

  5. Bioda January 31, 2012 at 3:18 pm #

    hi??

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